PRAGMATIC ISSUES

  • “Trump’s Cold War Heartbreak: When Putin Ghosted His Biggest Fan”

    Once upon a time, Donald Trump looked at Vladimir Putin the way a high school sophomore looks at the quarterback who just threw him a wink across the locker room. It was all admiration, projection, and just a touch of dangerous fantasy. Trump thought he’d found in Putin a kindred spirit another “strong man” who…

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  • When 30% Becomes “America” – How Lazy Headlines Inflate Dangerous Narratives

      Here we go again…the pollsters run a survey, the reporters slap on a headline, and suddenly we’re told that “Americans” think X, Y, or Z. This week’s gem? And, folks apparently, we woke up in a new country today. Not the United States of America, but the United States of Poll Respondents. The Hill…

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  • Buckle Up: The Government Just Hit the Shutdown Button

    Is anyone else tired of these two high school girls having a cat fight whilst lives hangs in the balance? The ability to pay bills, get medical care, buy food…it’s exhausting. Two teams that continually show just how they cannot work together. Forget your office teams who should be able to work together, these are…

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  • Cocaine Is Back, Baby — And Denver’s Already at the Front of the Line

      America didn’t “fall back in love” with cocaine. America never quit. We didn’t ghost coke, we just stopped posting about it on Instagram while fentanyl and opioids hogged the spotlight. Now headlines are breathlessly announcing the “cocaine comeback” like it’s Fleetwood Mac reuniting. The reality is that cocaine never left the tour bus. In…

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  • Nextdoor – The HOA From Hell Disguised as Social Media

    If you’ve ever thought, “I wish Facebook had more tattling and fewer friends,” then congratulations you’ve already downloaded Nextdoor, the worst social media app in existence. Nextdoor isn’t really a platform but rather it is a 24/7 neighborhood HOA meeting that you sadly cannot escape. A place where Becky tells Susie that her “Karen haircut”…

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  • BREAKING: Trump’s Imaginary Troop Parade in Portland

      BREAKING: Donald Trump has once again threatened to invade… Portland. Not Tehran. Not Pyongyang.     But rather, Portland, Oregon, the land of food carts, ironic mustaches, and kombucha on tap. He “authorized Full Force” to protect federal property, which in Trump-speak could mean anything from ICE buildings to the nearest Dunkin’ Donuts. To…

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  • Hulu’s Secrets of the Hell’s Angels – Denver Edition

        You: a feared outlaw biker gang with your own Hulu documentary, allegedly running underground empires and striking fear into communities nationwide. Me: a tired Denver local living next to Crack Alley™, I coined the crack ally name and if anyone has a beef with that, get fucked. Hulu recently dropped Secrets of the…

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  • America’s Political Crossroads – Why Democrats Risk Losing the Future

    The story of American politics today is one of fatigue. A weary electorate, exhausted by years of division, culture wars, and the relentless churn of crises, is quietly recalibrating its expectations. People want less theater and more competence. If Trump’s address at the United Nations did not embarrass Democrats and American’s enough to act, it’s…

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  • The Rapture That Didn’t Happen… Again

        By Our Non-Ascended Correspondent   Well, it’s the day after yet another highly advertised Rapture, and here we all still are, bills unpaid, laundry unfolded, traffic jams intact. The internet promised us heavenly airlifts and divine Uber rides to glory. Instead, I got a soggy burrito and the same junk mail from Comcast.…

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